Taboo Tuesday Topic: Depression

KTKards1You are my hiding place.  You preserve me from trouble.  You surround me with songs of deliverance.  Psalm 32:7 (paraphrased)

Some people seem to think Christians cannot suffer from depression.  If they do, they must not be “real” Christians.    I think I have battled depression to one degree or another for most of my life.  I would love to be one of those sunny, bubbly, magnetic Christians who draw people to them like mosquitoes to suntan oil.  But I’m not.  That’s just not my personality.  I’m a listener by nature, and some people seem to mistake that quietness for a judgmental attitude, which I honestly don’t believe I have.  That’s not to say I can’t talk.  I probably have less trouble with public speaking than most people.  But I’m a stoic.  Even writing a blog like this is extremely hard for me.  Pouring my heart out doesn’t come at all naturally.

Even as a child, I suffered from depression.  This verse from Psalms was one of my favorites for as long as I can remember.  When I was younger, I tended to think of my life as a Cinderella story, and Wade was my Prince Charming.  Our “happily ever after” lasted for almost forty years.

But after only ten years, Prince Charming decided his name was actually Daniel Boone, and we moved way back into the woods, and up on top of a mountain.  With only one car and three kids, life got a bit depressing again.  So I started writing, mostly, to be honest, because there was little TV reception.

Then one day ten years later, Daniel Boone finally came home and said we were moving back into town.  I was so elated!  But a few days later, he came home again and said the deal had fallen through.  I was so angry with God, I literally shook my fist at Him, and said if He didn’t give me my house, I would no longer serve Him.  So He gave me my house.  It was the worst mistake I ever made.  Not that it wasn’t a wonderful house.  It was.  It was us who changed.  My kids were influenced by their peers, and work became a focus for both Wade and me,  I began to develop many physical symptoms from stress.

But it wasn’t until Wade and I split and Kara had her death sentence that I suffered the severest depression.  I began to have thoughts of suicide.  The only thing that kept me from it at first was knowing I had to take care of Kara.  God used friends like Krystal Weeks, and music, and many other things to stay my hand..

One thing I’ve always done to combat depression is to surround myself with those same sunny, bubbly Christians I just mentioned.  I do this because I know that I tend to reflect the mood of the people I’m with.  For forty years I was married to a “super-optimist.”  We had a joke that I kept his feet firmly planted on the ceiling and he kept me from slipping through the basement.  My daughter Kristina said the other day that we had always brought out the best in each other.  And she was right!

After he left, I had to find my own path to that inner joy that goes beyond personality to a peace with who I am in Christ.  Krystal and I read a lot of Scripture, spent a lot of time out in nature, and I made other real friends too.  I’ve learned though that I can’t let other people determine my mood.  I’ve got to depend only on Him for my Joy.  And I have to realize that joy doesn’t depend on circumstances.  I can’t control those.

Joy is Jesus, there for me every day, holding my hand, walking me through the tough days, and giving me strength.  I still do battle with depression, but battle it I will.  He is my strength.  He is my hiding place.  He surrounds me with songs of deliverance.  I’m determined to become all that I can be in Christ, not just despite my personality, but within it, because after all, it too was a gift from Him.

TABOO TUESDAY QUESTION OF THE DAY:  When have you struggled with depression?  What are some ways God has used to overcome it for you?

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About TeresaGPollard

Born and raised in Richmond, VA, I am a Christian Mom, Grandma, Sunday School Teacher, and now Author. My goal is to reach people with the Truth of God's Word and help them to apply it to their real world situations.
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4 Responses to Taboo Tuesday Topic: Depression

  1. yosemitesyd says:

    I get discouraged sometimes, but rarely depressed. That doesn’t mean I don’t deal with depression. I have friends and family members who suffer from depression. Those of us who walk on the ceiling need to learn how to be sensitive to those who get stuck to the floor. It took me a long time to understand this condition; along the way, I lost friends because I took their pasted on smiles at face value and wasn’t sensitive to what was going on under the surface. It is so much better to be able to talk about it; I appreciate being told what is going on what I can do to help. These conversations are sometimes painful, but in the long run they strengthen relationships.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thanks, Sydney. You’re absolutely right. We do need to talk more about things. That’s the only way we’re going to be able to help each other. And you’re also right that depression affects everyone, not just the one suffering from it. God bless you.

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  2. Krystal Weeks says:

    Psalms 32:7 was the verse I read at the YMCA the day after my husband left. I had taught middle school for thirty years and survived that, but after two years of dealing with lawyers and my mother’s Parkinson’s disease. I was really depressed. Teresa you are one of the friends God sent to help me get through it. When I was in my deepest depression, I felt like a black blanket was dropped over my spirit. I had always been a positive, bubbly person, but I didn’t see any hope. My brother, daughter, and sister-in-law talked me into going to a Mental Health Facility. I was over-medicated at first. I was going to a Counselor and Psychiatrist. God worked it out for the Psychiatrist to have a cancellation and I told him I was depressed. He gave me the right meds and I got my smile back.. My Sunday School Class was there for me too. Now, I am active in church again. God has given me a new hope. I am now a fully functioning servant of the Lord. I have begun writing articles. I thank God for my recovery and for giving me “hope and a future” (Jeremiah 29:11)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Krystal truly is one of the most bubbly “ceiling walkers” I know. I think it shows that depression does not always equal a general negativity that comes from a root of bitterness. It’s simply falling prey to Satan’s attacks for a time until we allow Jesus to lift us out of it. And He will if we let him. Krystal and I chased waterfalls from Niagara to Puerto Rico, but that was one of the many things God used to restore us to the “joy of our salvation.”

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